Final Four Ch’alk’ Full of Talent

By Chad Ruter:

The final buzzer has sounded at all regional sites, and all hands are on deck for San Antonio. For the first time in the history of the NCAA Tournament’s 64/65 team field, all four No. 1 seeds will be playing at the same site to duke it out for the title. UNC, UCLA, Memphis, and Kansas all played their way to Texas with very few hiccups, and it should make for one helluva Final Four.

As for my brackets, I am in a position I’ve never been in before. I sit alone in 6th place in the Scoutware standings, with a chance to take home first place if UCLA beats UNC in the National Championship game. If UCLA beats Kansas, I’ll finish second. As with any bracket though, you have to get the championship game correct, and I’ve been correct for the past two years, let’s make it three!

For the TOUTS league, I sit in fifth place, but that doesn’t matter. What matters is that I am 10 points (the equivalent of one first round game) ahead of Justin. Remember folks, loser has to wear the hat of the other’s favorite baseball for two days, one when we are together, another when we are going about our daily business (with picture proof of the day we aren’t together). If UNC wins the championship, Justin wins. If UCLA wins, I win. If neither teams wins, I win. These are my kinda odds!!

I also submitted a bracket to my buddy Jason’s pool, in which I have UNC beating UCLA in the finals, and three out of the four Final Four teams correct. I’m not sure what my position is in that pool, and if I have a chance at some cash or not…but let’s assume I do have a chance at winning the title, and break down the eight different scenarios we could have.

UNC over KU, UCLA over Mem, UCLA over UNC: I win the Scoutware pool and win J and mines bet.
UNC over KU, UCLA over Mem, UNC over UCLA: I win Jason’s pool, but lose the bet with J.
UNC over KU, Mem over UCLA, UNC over Mem: Fairly sure I win no money, and lose the bet. BAD!
UNC over KU, Mem over UCLA, Mem over UNC: No money, and lose bet. BAD!
KU over UNC, UCLA over Mem, UCLA over KU: Second place money in Scoutware and win bet.
KU over UNC, UCLA over Mem, KU over UCLA: No money, but I win the bet.
KU over UNC, Mem over UCLA, KU over Mem: No money, but I win the bet.
KU over UNC, Mem over UCLA, Mem over KU: No money, but I win the bet.

Let’s just say I have a lot on the line in that UCLA game…

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The Cubs begin play tomorrow, and I couldn’t be more excited. Baseball is by far my favorite sport, and with the Cubs having an extremely talented team that is stronger than it was in 2007, this year could be the best year yet as a baseball fan. The Cubbies finalized their roster yesterday, and here are my thoughts:

-Kosuke Fukudome batting fifth is a waste of his number one talent: getting on base. Making the walk to first base is what we brought him over to America for, so why are we putting him on base in front of our 6-7-8 hitters? The excuse is that we need him to break up all the righthanders in our lineup. That theory makes little sense considering the Cubs struggle hitting lefties, not righties. So why are the Cubs worrying about breaking up the righties? Doesn’t make sense.

-The lineup the Cubs should use features Ryan Theriot leading off, Fukudome second, Derrek Lee third, Aramis Ramirez fourth and Alfonso Soriano fifth. It’s a myth that a guy with stealing ability has to leadoff. Soriano can use his speed no matter where he hits. He’s only guaranteed to lead off in one inning of the game, and since his on base percentage isn’t suitable for an everyday leadoff guy, you have to get him as far away from the leadoff spot as possible, but close enough to the middle of the order where he can bash in runs. Hmmmm….fifth?

-I love the decision to put Kerry Wood in the closers role. Lou Piniella uses his setup men very liberally throughout the season, and Wood is not a guy that you can use liberally. You have to be careful with him because of his arm troubles over the years. The Cubs are one of the few teams that can afford to protect him in the closers role because of guys like Bob Howry, Carlos Marmol, Michael Wurtz, and Kevin Hart who are there to protect him. All of those guys had above-average springs bar Howry, who is known for his slow starts.

-The pickup of Reed Johnson provides a bit of relief because he provides something the Cubs didn’t have: a righty that could play centerfield well. The downside of signing him, however, means Matt Murton, a sabermatricians dream, is going to be traded. It’s the right thing to do. Even though an injury in the OF could mean an immediate opening in the starting lineup, the Cubs want to see him be successful, even if it isn’t with Chicago. I see them trading him to an AL team just because trading a player like this is not something you want to see more than you have to if you can help it.

-Off subject a bit, but it has to be said. Joe Morgan really pisses me off. Jon Miller mentions that the season officially started in Japan earlier in the week, and Morgan responds by saying, “I only recognize tonight. Opening night in America.” Talk about a senial old man who can’t respect the fact that Major League Baseball is an international game. He is a complete joke as an announcer and as a former Major Leaguer.

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With this being the eve of full-fledged baseball action, I have some modest proposals for a few teams around the league. I’ll start in the AL and go from West to East, then move to the NL, and go from West to East.

-Los Angeles Angels of Anaheim – With their starting rotation ravaged by injuries, the time has come to trade Triple-A shortstop Brandon Wood. He has great power potential (23+ homers in each of the past three seasons, including a 43 homer year in A+ ball that put him on the map in 2005), but has a serious strikout problem (415 K’s in just 376 games in the last three years from A+ to MLB). Teams still covet Wood because of his power potential, and the Angels are always going to be gunshy to bring him up because he strikes out so much. They may only get 80 cents on the dollar for him, they need to get an established pitcher to stabalize that rotation. A Jeremy Guthrie for Wood trade would seem to work.

-Seattle Mariners – I agree with Kelli Anderson of Sports Illustrated here. With catching prospect Jeff Clement ready for the majors while sitting in Triple-A Tacoma, the Mariners should trade Kenji Johjima. Johji is in the last year of his contract with Seattle, and would bring back a couple of good prospects in return. Maybe a power outfielder such as Ken Griffey Jr. as Anderson wrote. If the Mariners are out of the race, look for teams like the New York Mets, Milwaukee Brewers, and the Boston Red Sox to be involved in the bidding.

-Detroit Tigers – For a team that has its sights set on scoring 1,000 runs, and winning 100 games, they are sure thin on pitching, especially relief pitching. As of right now they have a platoon of Marcus Thames and Jacque Jones paired in left field. If they can a contending team looking for a solid outfielder, and that team has an extra reliever, I see them flipping one of those two guys on the way out. Then they would move Miguel Cabrera out to LF, and Brandon Inge back to third. Not only would they bolster their pitching, they would be prolly 2-3 wins better defensively with Inge at the hot corner.

-New York Yankees – They are going to purge $81 million dollars off their payroll by the end of this calendar year, freeing up more than enough money to sign both the best free agent pitcher (C.C. Sabathia) and hitter (Mark Teixeira) to long-term contracts. Those two guys both are 28 years old, and fill two positions the Yankees have lacked for years (power hitting first baseman and No. 1 starter). Scary, isn’t it? The shame is they are still locked into two of the ten worst contracts in baseball. Jorge Posada had a career year and parlayed it into a crazy four-year deal. Mariano Rivera is really good, but has seen his numbers slip in each of the past three seasons. A three-year contract for him at $15 million per was not a great decision either. The problem: they had to have each of those guys because they had no option-B.

-Baltimore Orioles – After trading Miguel Tejada and Erik Bedard, it makes no sense to hang onto Brian Roberts and Melvin Mora any longer than they have to. If you’re in full-fledged rebuilding mode, get it over with quick. Trade the guys you plan on trading, and get it over with so that you are 100% focused on 2010 and 2011.

-Colorado Rockies – If they don’t have plans to keep Garrett Atkins long term, then flip him to another team for a reliever and starter. The Minnesota Twins would be a smart trading partner here. They have the bullpen depth, and are in desparate need of another hitter. Ian Stewart is ready to go for the Rockies, and the dropoff in production would be miniscule. The upgrade in the bullpen would make up for it.

-Los Angeles Dodgers – It’s simple here. If Juan Pierre takes playing time away from either Andre Ethier or Matt Kemp, it will be a crime against Dodger Nation. Don’t do it Joe, don’t you dare!

-San Diego Padres – I don’t understand many of the moves they make, but they always seem to be in the race because they have dominant top-of-the-rotation starters that kill opponents in PETCO Park. Chase Headley needs to be playing everyday in this lineup somewhere, whether its 3B or LF. They surely could use the offense, and Scott Hairston should not be starting for a team that plans on contending.

-San Francisco Giants – They have pitching in the 3-5 year pipeline, and have 0 position players that are worth a hoot. Tim Lincecum has nasty stuff, but if he cant control his offspeed pitches, he gets lit up quicker than a radar gun shooting the interstate because his fastball is laser straight. If they can trade him for a couple of minor league bats, it would be a good decision.

-Cincinnati Reds – Joey Votto, Jay Bruce, Johnny Cueto, and Edinson Volquez should all be on the major league roster together. Four rookies is a lot, but all of these guys have all-star potential. If you bring them up all at once, they have guys that are their age, and have players to relate to. Plus they can learn from guys like Aaron Harang and Ken Griffey Jr., two of the best major leaguers at what they do.

-Milwaukee Brewers – If Derrick Turnbow pitches in any one-run games, it’s Ned Yost’s fault for the teams demise. That man should not be in the game unless the run differential is four or more.

The Home Stretch

By: Justin Jacobs

Tomorrow the NCAA tournament will resume, and millions of people around the country will be hoping to God that UCLA doesn’t lose. Most people would say that the NCAA tournament is the best post season tournament in all of sports, but I’m not most people. My favorite post season has always been the NBA’s. Given, I’ve been spoiled by the likes of Michael Jordan, Kobe Bryant and Shaquille O’Neal all these years, but I don’t think it really gets any better than the NBA playoffs. I know what you’re thinking, the NBA playoffs are too long and most of the teams in the East are terrible, and you’re right. But you don’t have to watch those terrible series, that’s the beauty of the remote control! On the other hand I challenge you to find a greater sports moment last year than LeBron’s 47 point performance against the Pistons in the Eastern Conference Finals. Say what you want about the NBA, but the level of play is on a whole other level than what you get out of college basketball. That’s not to take anything away from college hoops, I love the tournament as much as the next guy, but the NBA is where it is at for me.

So I’ve asserted how much I love the playoffs in the NBA, but unfortunately we’re still a few weeks away from the start of the opening round. Most years this would be one of the worst times of the year for the NBA, a time of year where the most interesting thing going on is arguing about all the tanking that goes on (Miami says hello). This year, however, we have one of the tightest conference races in NBA history, I’m sure you’ve heard by now that the Western Conference is pretty good, but how are things going to shake out? The Lakers were able to beat both Dallas and Utah recently without Pau Gasol or Andrew Bynum, and still are tied for the best record in the Western Conference with New Orleans. Which really begs the question, who is the MVP? I think at this point we can narrow the race down to Kobe and Chris Paul. All due to respect to LeBron James, but the Cavs aren’t playing in the West, and they aren’t the best team in the East. LeBron is having one of the greatest seasons in NBA history, but I think Paul and Bryant are having even better years. Yeah, I said it! I’m going to have to agree with the Sports Guy, (Bill Simmons) in saying that Chris Paul is having the single greatest season as a point guard in NBA history. Kobe on the other hand is having arguably the greatest season as a closer in NBA history. Every time a game gets down to the last three minutes or so, Kobe doesn’t miss. Which is pretty much par for the course with Kobe, but he’s also completely shutting down the other teams best guard. Both Kobe and Paul have their teams at the top of the best conference race in NBA history, and if I had a vote for MVP, it would probably go to the guy who carries his respective team to the better seed.

With all this Western Conference MVP talk it would be easy to jump to the conclusion that I hate all the teams from the Eastern Conference. Nothing could be further from the truth. I still think that the Boston Celtics are the team to beat in the NBA. Why? For two reasons, with the teams in the Western Conference beating each other up to get into the playoffs, let alone how brutal the Western Conference playoffs are going to be, any team that comes out of the East is going to have an advantage in the playoffs. The other thing that I love about the Celtics is their depth. They have the big three obviously, but they also have one of the top benches in the NBA. Guys like Big Baby Davis, Leon Powe, Sam Cassell, Eddie House and Tony Allen all can be game changers off the bench. This allows the Celtics to play all-out defense, they have the best defense in the league, and also allows them to rest the big three for long stretches at a time; which is a good thing because Allen, Garnett and Pierce have about 300,000 collective miles on their tires.

As good as the Celtics are however, they still have to be worried about Detroit and Cleveland. I don’t think there’s a player on the Celtics who can guard LeBron James. Well, to be fair, there’s not a single player in the league who can guard LeBron James. But as much as I love ‘Bron, he’s my second favorite player in the NBA, I don’t think Cleveland has enough overall talent to overcome Boston, or Detroit for that matter. There’s something about Detroit being under the radar that scares me. They are playing much better basketball on the offensive and defensive side of the ball this year, and I don’t see LeBron giving that once in a lifetime performance two years in a row. Again, nine times out of ten in the NBA the team with the better overall game is going to win in a best of seven series. Detroit has the big time guards (Billups and Hamilton), a monster post player in Rasheed Wallace, and that all-purpose player every great team needs in Tayshaun Prince. That all being said, I wouldn’t be surprised to see Cleveland knocks off either of Boston or Detroit, because I’ve seen James do it before, but I don’t think it’s likely.

Then there’s the Western Conference….

It’s a pretty safe bet to say that no “expert” really has a handle on the Western Conference this year. I mean, did anyone see Houston winning 22 straight? How about the rise of New Orleans and Utah, and the decline of Dallas? Not to mention all of the crazy trades that have changed multiple the face of multiple teams for the next five years. Now we are at this mad dash for the finish line with there only being six games separating the top teams (LA and New Orleans) from the ninth place team (Denver). It’s down right pathetic that if the playoffs started today Denver will miss the playoffs with a 43-28 record yet Atlanta would get in with a 30-40 record. There needs to be a new system and it needs to be implemented sooner than later, get on it Stern! Either way, every match-up in the first round of the Western Conference playoffs is going to be grueling. You can bet most of the teams are really hoping they get lucky enough to face Houston in the first round. The Rockets are coming off a huge emotional high after the winning streak and are without their best player, Yao Ming, for the rest of the season. On the other hand no one wants to play Golden State. Just ask Dallas what happens when you go up against The Warriors in a first round series. Baron Davis is the most underrated player in the league and Monte Ellis would probably be the runner up. If you try to play at Golden State’s pace you are going to lose, plain and simple. Imagine if Phoenix gets pitted against the Warriors in the first round, it could possibly be the greatest first round series in NBA history.

Speaking of Phoenix, after floundering early after getting Shaq they are now on a role. They’ve won seven out of their last ten and Amare Stoudemire is starting to look like Moses Malone now that Shaq is keeping other teams from doubling him. It took Steve Nash a little bit of time to get used to having the big man down low clogging up the lane, but he’s made a great adjustment and now Phoenix has to be considered one of the favorites to win in the West. They now have a player in Shaq who can effectively guard Tim Duncan, whereas San Antonio has no one to effectively guard Amare, who is playing the best ball of his career. I think that Steve Nash and Tony Parker will cancel each other out because neither one will be able to play any defense on each other. That leaves Manu Ginobli, who can go on scoring runs like Reggie Miller used to, against Leandro Barbosa, one of the fastest players in the NBA. I’m really hoping that these two teams face each other sometime during the Western Conference playoffs, if for no other reason than to see what happens when Steve Nash tries to dribble past Robert Horry. You just don’t mess with Big Shot Rob. I’m starting to think that these two teams are best prepared to make a run in the playoffs, depending on how well Shaq can hold up and….

How will the return of Pau Gasol and Andrew Bynum effect the Lakers? We saw that when Kobe and Gasol were working well with each other the Lakers were close to unbeatable. Every time defending teams put too much of an emphasis on Kobe Bryant Gasol would get an easy dunk, and by every time I mean EVERY…TIME. Kobe is going to be a force in the playoffs, that’s a given, he’s one of the top five guards in NBA history, and he’s almost unguardable in the final minutes of a game. Like I said with LeBron though, in the playoffs you can’t do it by yourself, see the Lakers last couple of playoff experiences. This is different however, the Lakers now have a solid veteran point guard in Derek Fisher, not to mention a very capable back-up in Jordan Farmar. Most people probably have never heard of Sasha Vujacic, but he is a great three point shooter and a tenacious defender that can guard both the two and the three. Lamar Odom is one of the best all-purpose players in the league and Andrew Bynum can go 10-10 no matter who he is up against… if he’s healthy. That’s the question isn’t it. Bynum was supposed to be back playing by now, but he’s gone through a number of setbacks and will not be set to come back until around the time the playoffs start. Gasol is also coming off an injury, if less serious, and no one knows how well Gasol and Bynum will mesh. If Gasol and Bynum are able to compete at 100% and are able to mesh well, I think the Lakers can win it all this year. They have the deepest team in the league, two athletic seven footers and arguably the best player in the league, not to mention one of the greatest coaches in NBA history, but there are still a lot of unanswered questions.

So who will win it all this year? I really don’t see a clear favorite, although if I had to bet I’d put a five piece down on Boston. I think they have the path of least resistance and a very deep team, although Doc Rivers is still their head coach so who knows. The West is about as wide open as any race has ever been. We have been treated to some of the best basketball in years and I really have no idea who deserves the MVP. I’m still excited for the rest of the NCAA tournament, but I’m even more excited about the NBA playoffs. I think it says something that I haven’t even mentioned MLB’s opening day this week. I’m really excited about that too, but we’ll have all summer for that. Right now let’s get excited for the NBA playoffs because for the first time in over a decade the NBA matters again.

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Editors Note: For anyone playing fantasy baseball on ESPN, when you add someone to the DL make sure you reset your roster for the following day. I had to learn the hard way and now Rich Harden’s six inning, nine strikeout, one earned performance will not count. If I lose in any of those categories because of these shananigans this week I am going to be pissed.

Opening Day 2008 Live Blog!

By: Chad Ruter

(5:03am CDT): Live from my apartment living room in Westmont, Illinois it’s time to celebrate Opening Day 2008 between the Boston Red Sox and Oakland Athletics! Gary Thorne and Steve Phillips will have the call live on ESPN2, and not even two minutes into the pregame standup does Phillips go to bat for the A’s, saying they can beat anyone on any given day because of all of their young talent – citing Bobby Crosby. If you’re relying on Bobby Crosby, God help you.

(5:06am CDT): Brandon Moss starting in RF! Sounds like JD Drew has some back problems coming into today’s games. Talk about a horribly overpaid player. There was obviously some tampering when he left the Dodgers before last season. There is no way a player that gets injured that often walks away from $20 million guaranteed, and steps into a contract worth $75 million. Scott Boras had some under-the-table action going on.

(5:09am CDT): 329 feet down the lines…no steroids necessary in Japan! You just have to drink the Kool-aid.

(5:10am CDT): STRIKEEEEEEEEEEEEEE! Then Dustin Pedroia slashes a single past Crosby into CF. Let the hit parade begin.

(5:12am CDT): Hot shot to third is bobbled by Hannahan, and can only throw out Youkilis at first. Eric Chavez never makes that error. Ewwwww…first pitch popout bt David Ortiz. High fastball over the outer half, and he couldn’t get on top of it. Here comes Man Ram. Contract year = 40 homers….all for my fantasy team!

(5:15am CDT): Flyout to RF by Manny ends the inning. Blanton threw all fastballs in that first inning. Location was pretty good, and not too much damage. Now it’s time to see Daisuke Matsuzaka throw in his homeland. He sure better pitch well, because there is no bigger homefield advantage. Solid rookie season last season for Matsuzaka, but the BoSox need more out of him with all of the injury concerns in their rotation.

(5:18am CDT): How ’bout that for efficiency. One pitch, and Travis Buck rolls over one to Pedroia. Is there anything more awkward then Dice-K’s windup? It’s like he humps the air twice before he turns and fires. Kinda creepy actually. Uhhh oh….so much for the homefield advantage…4-seamer just got blasted to downtown Tokyo. 1-0 Oakland.

(5:21am CDT): Dice-K is having the same problems in inning one that we saw all of last year. Very little command on his breaking pitches, and he throws them way to often, and his fastball isn’t good enough to be the only pitch he gets over. He served that homer up on 2-0 to a fastball that was nutted. Now he walks Barton to get to Cust…yikes.

(5:23am CDT): Varitek’s first mound visit of 2008, and Dice-K has pitched 1/3 of an inning. It’s pretty simple…breaking balls to Cust, he’s the a-typical Three True Outcomes guy. After throwing a great change-up, he threw the ball behind Cust and it hit him in the foot. This could be a long game.

(5:26am CDT): Perfect analysis by Steve Phillips. Sit on a fastball. He can’t throw anything else over the plate. Dice-K needs to stick with the fastball/change-up combo. Where the hell is John Farrell? Your Japanese phenom just loaded the bases with two walks and an HBP.

(5:30am CDT): Wow! Amazingly athletic play by Dice-K. He gives up the run, but makes a fantastic play over at first. Crosby gets the ribby, and now its 2-0 A’s.

(5:32am CDT): Why is Hannahan swinging??? Dice-K has thrown maybe five pitches over the plate, so just stand there until he throws you two strikes! Luckily Hannahan chases three strikes outside the zone. Finally! I can go get some cereal.

End of 1st – 2-0 A’s lead

(5:36am CDT): Yummmm. Bowl-O-Cheerios. Breakfast of champions baby. Nice first-pitch rip by Mike Lowell. He had a big year last year, and it was a good move by the BoSox to bring him back. Phenomenal defense and doubles power with the green monster.

(5:38am CDT): A shot of Terry “Tito” Francona shows him wearing the famous pullover that they forced off of him last year to make sure he had his jersey underneath. Apparently he just got that approved by Major League Baseball. The man has respitory problems for God’s sake! Let him wear the dang jacket. Double play ends the inning…and we get to see Dice-K walk four more.

(5:40am CDT): It’s dark outside…

(5:42am CDT): Single to center to start off the 2nd. I wonder if Gary Thorne has talked to Doug Mirabelli lately? Has anyone for that matter? Did he sign with someone after the BoSox released him last week? All these questions, and it isn’t even 6am. I better stop.

(5:45am CDT): Thorne just said Red Sox pitching coach John Farrell helped Dice-K add two pitches during the offseason. What the hell pitches would those be? A splitter in the dirt and a piped fastball? He throws every other pitch on the planet, why not get really good at three of the ones he already has. Good slider to strikeout Travis Buck, but the A’s got a steal out of the deal.

(5:52am CDT): After getting two strikes on Ellis, Dice-K walked him. Then he throws a first-pitch changeup to Barton. Throw that freaking change-up to right-handers. It’s a good enough pitch that they will swing over the top of it. Matsuzaka is into the 60-pitch range, and Julian Tavarez is getting loose. So much for a solid start from Dice-K.

(5:54am CDT): Walk…and we finally get a John Farrell sighting. Now Cust is up. He’s a fastball only hitter, hitting against a guy that can only throw his fastball for strikes. I say he’s gonna throw a change on the first pitch……..Damn…I was wrong.

(5:58am CDT): Cust strikes out on a pitch that misses inside. C’mon now ump!! I grabbed Cust in the late rounds of my fantasy draft on Saturday…you cant call that a strike! That’s a B.S. call! Your mother coul………..I’ll stop there.

End of 2- 2-0 A’s

(6:04am CDT): It’s amazing how well you can pitch in the majors by throwing a 90+ fastball with control. Blanton isn’t getting his breaking stuff over either. Ellsbury struck out on the same pitch that Cust did, and Lugo singled.

(6:09am CDT): After a hot-shot to the third baseman Hannahan resulted in an infield single…a 3-1 pitch by Blanton should’ve ended up in the RF seats to Ortiz. Instead, he bases it right into the shift for out number three. It’s amazing that he hit above .325 last season hitting the ball through 5 players on the right half of the field. Just incredible. Lay one down, big man!!

(6:12am CDT): NOTE TO EMIL BROWN – DICE-K HAS THROWN 60+ PITCHES IN THE FIRST TWO INNINGS…DO NOT SWING AT ANYTHING ON THE FIRST PITCH! The delay in getting this communication across the Pacific resulted in a pop-out on a soft curve.

(6:18am CDT): Kurt Suzuki, Oakland’s “secret weapon” lines out on a laser to Lugo. Bud Selig will join the guys in the booth for the fourth inning. If I get five questions to ask him, here’s what they would be:
1. The Mitchell Report accused a staggering number of players of using PED’s, why did the commissioners office ignore the problem for so long?
2. Did the extra money for the Red Sox coaches come out of your $13 million salary?
3. Who are you going to annoint as your successor when you retire?
4. Who is going to be the owner of the Cubs next year?
5. Why won’t you let Mark Cuban be a Major League Baseball owner?

End of 3- 2-0 A’s

(6:25am CDT): And after a one-half of an inning with Bud Selig, we learned exactly zilch – except for the fact he couldn’t sleep last night. We know he’s got magic pills, just take the damn things.

(6:28am CDT): Gary Thorne moves onto the “tough” questions. The problem is he asks the wrong one. Worded horribly to a point where Selig can wiggle out of it. Steve hits the follow-up question out of the park. He gets Selig to say what we all knew. He wanted to pay George Mitchell for something. For the baseball game, a nice quick inning by Dice-K may have bought him another.

End of 4- 2-0 A’s

(6:36am CDT): We come back for the 5th, and apparently that ended the tough question portion of our program. Selig must’ve handed Thorne the $100k he had in his pocket. Blanton is rocking through this awesome Red Sox lineup. It’s a simple formula for him: Command and control the fastball to both sides of the plate and use the off-speed pitches either on the first pitch or in two strike situations.

(6:39am CDT): My breakfast of champions just expanded to my first Mountan Dew for the day. The people at Scoutware that think I’m on a caffeine high when I’m at work. Ha, they ain’t seen nothin’ yet!

(6:40am CDT): I just called Angie Dundee, Muhammed Ali’s corner man, to run me an IV drip for this Mountain Dew. Let’s just skip me having to drink it – let’s go right to the bloodstream.

(6:44am CDT): Mountain Dew is the nectar of life!! Daisuke is starting to warm up. ‘Bout time, it’s the fifth freaking inning. Back-to-back strikeouts. Steve Phillips finally agrees with me. Matsuzaka needs to throw that change-up a lot more – maybe as frequently as a guy like Johan Santana throws it. It’s got a beautiful drop with great arm speed and some tail to it. How about a 1-2-3 inning for ‘ol Dice. He’s done for the day…

(6:49am CDT): Is Mountain Dew really the dew off of a mountain? These are questions that must be answered! Let’s see what google/wikipedia has to say…

(6:52am CDT): According to Wikipedia, “A more significant problem with Mountain Dew is the presence of High Fructose Corn Syrup [HFCS], which has been linked to liver problems. HFCS contains a sugar that–unlike glucose, which can be metabolized in any body cell–can only be metabolized in the liver. The load this presents to the liver has also been linked to cirrosis.” Welllllll, that’s a bummer. Looks like I’m going to have liver problems by age 23.

(6:55am CDT): Two on, none out and Big Papi up with a full count. Have to throw him an outside fastball with Manny on-deck.

(6:56am CDT): Papi pops out, but Manny laces a double to the LF corner. WOOOO! There’s my fourth round pick racking me up a couple RBIs. 2-2 tie. The stakes are higher for me to win this season with that unfortunate liver information I uncovered above.

(7:02am CDT): Brandon Moss hits a ribby single to give me a 3-0 lead over Luke in fantasy baseball, and a 3-2 lead for his BoSox. It’s never too early to scoreboard watch people!

(7:05am CDT): Justin, you can have my PS2 memory card to continue my Madden/MVP/Tiger Woods dominance after this cirrosis sets in- and everything else you want in my apartment. My golf clubs go back to Luke, since there his anyways. My movie collection can be dispersed among everyone….I only have about 20. My Jeep goes back to my family…God knows we always need three spare vehicles.

(7:10am CDT): Embree K’s Jason Varitek to end the threat. But the Sox have the lead back 3-2 with Dice-K in line for the win.

End of 5- 3-2 BoSox

(7:11am CDT): Kyle Snyder is a perfect middle-relief man in the majors. Can start if necessary, can go multiple innings in relief, and gets quick outs. Just as I say that, a chopped single through the middle starts the inning.

(7:13am CDT): So much for Dice-K getting the win. Hannahan mashed a nutted fastball over the RF wall. 4-3 A’s.

(7:15am CDT): Who the hell is running the cameras for this game? Jeez they zoom oddly. Must be Japanese guy with Harry Caray thick glasses.

End of 6- 4-3 A’s

(7:22am CDT): It’s the first day of the new baseball season, and I’m already depressed. This Mountain Dew news is really a downer. OK people….in an effort to live past the age of 23, this Mountain Dew next to me will be the last I ever drink! You have to help me on this one! Cirrosis turns people yellow. I don’t want to be yellow. By the way…Happy 22nd birthday to my buddy Dan Garcia. I’m here to inform you your invincibility ran out last night at midnight.

(7:24am CDT): Not only do the cameramen suck, but the audio guy is batting below the Mendoza line, and is dangerously close the Orton line. You need to turn down Gary Thorne’s mic when the outro music comes up! He’s going to drop an F-bomb regarding Steve Phillips’ mother and we’re all going to hear about it on The Duece. If that happens, he’ll be officially banished to The Ocho.

(7:26am CDT): The sun has been up for about an hour…did I mention that? Probably not…I’ve cried twice since I read that news about MD.

(7:27am CDT): After giving up a Mark Ellis warning track fly-ball for out numero uno, that’s the end of the day for Kyle Snyder. Final line: 1 1/3IP, 2ER…I betcha this will be his last trip to Tokyo.

(7:31am CDT): Side-winding lefty Javier Lopez comes in to face the lefties Barton and Cust. Barton lined out, and Cust, true to his TTO mantra….strikes out on a fastball that missed outside.

End of 7- 4-3 A’s

(7:34am CDT): It’s official: Japanese cameramen have no idea what headroom is, one guy has shaky camera syndrome, and a third zooms at two speeds, fast and ultra-fast.

(7:41am CDT): We were just told that Manny wants a six-year deal. Is he freaking nuts? He’s got two more team option years. There is no way in hell he gets that many years.

(7:44am CDT): If I drive off the interstate today…it’s because of the Mountain Dew news.

(7:46am CDT): I just burped my final Mountain Dew burp of my life. Sad sad day.

(7:49am CDT): Wow, what a catch by Jacoby Ellsbury! The probem with doing that is that it’s a perfect way to get hurt. There’s a good reason why the Red Sox haven’t traded Coco Crisp – and its because they are worried about Ellsbury playing too hard. We have our first Huston Street sighting in the ‘pen.

End of 8- 4-3 A’s

(7:54am CDT): Huston Street’s funky delivery is how he gets his outs. He also moves the ball around all over the place. Not your A-typical closer. Most guys throw upper-90’s and have one secondary pitch, Street uses a splitter and change-up that are extremely effective. Uh oh……sianara. 4-4 tie. Blown save numero uno for the Street man. Brandon Moss was a pretty solid addition to the lineup today. Two hits, a homer, two rbis, one to take the lead, and the other to tie it in the ninth.

(7:59am CDT): And with the game hanging in the balance….I have to go shower and get ready for work…just as Ellsbury tattoos one foul. Why didn’t they start this game at 4am!!!

Tourney Thoughts

By: Justin Jacobs

I’m not sure why Chad or I haven’t been talking about the NCAA tournament on this site. Between spring break and my fantasy baseball draft I just haven’t had much time to pontificate on some of the terrific basketball that we’ve been graced with recently. But really, isn’t March Madness always terrific? I’m happy to announce that all of my final four teams (North Carolina, Kansas, Texas, UCLA) have survived the first four rounds, which is more than I can say about Chad’s bracket. How about that Georgetown/Davidson game buddy? I’ll tell you one thing that Stephen Curry kid can play. He’s my early pick for most outstanding player of the tournament.

(Curry working on his 30 pt. game vs G-Town)

Besides Georgetown, Duke is the only other team from my elite eight that has been eliminated, which is fine by me. Everyone was so quick to describe their offense in terms of the Phoenix Suns style. I don’t think a team of slow white guys can be compared to an NBA team with phenomenal athletes. Leave it to a guy like Bob Huggins to bring great athletes to a college like West Virginia. I’m sure he won’t graduate half of them, but he’ll always have a good team. Either way they beat Duke, and that makes me a fan. You see what happens Duke? You see what happens when you rely so much on the three!

(West Virgina celebrating after beating Duke)

My favorite game so far would probably be a tie between the Western Kentucky/Drake game that went into overtime and the Stanford/Marquette game, which coincidentally also went into overtime. The way the Western Kentuckygame ended reminded me of the famous Vandy shot from all those years ago. Ty Rogers three pointer from over 25 feet away with three guys in his face was fantastic. I’ll remember the Stanford game for Brook Lopez’s leaner in overtime and Marquette stupidly tanking a three at the end of regulation instead of going for a lay-up. The score was tied, why take a three? The UCLA/Texas A&M game was also fantastic, everything should end with an eff you dunk.

Looking ahead we still have the top four seeds playing. I like North Carolina to advance if for no other reason than their home-court advantage. They have been killing teams so far, given they have been bad teams, but they’ve been playing well none-the-less. I’m hoping for a North Carolina/Tennessee match-up in the elite eight, that would be one hell of a game and the over/under would be 220 points. I think the best game of this round will probably be Stanford/Texas, especially the Brooks brothers vs Augustine/JJ Abrams match-up. I think the winner of this game will be able to beat Memphis and go on to the final four. Kansas got a little lucky with Clemson and Georgetown being upset so I think they have the easiest route to the final four and UCLA should be able to advance, but Xavier could be a tough elite eight test. Although I can still honestly say I don’t know the name of a single Xavier player.

(North Carolina has made it look easy so far, but can they win it all? I think so)

Well that about does it for my first round of ramblings about the tournament. I could go on all day talking about the stuff that we’ve all seen over the last week, but you’ve gotten the highlights. Look back to TOUTS in the upcoming days for more tournament coverage as well as a review of MLB 2K8 for the Xbox 360, a NBA update, opening day coverage and much, much more. Enjoy the rest of your Monday everyone.

Terry’s Tire World Draft Recap

By: Chad Ruter and Justin Jacobs

Editors Note: To follow along with what we are talking about, it would be wise to click this link to see the draft results. Enjoy!

Justin: So on a scale from one to ten how excited were you for this draft?

Chad: Right around a 17, I’d say. And I don’t even think that scratches the surface on how excited you were.

Justin: Yeah, the scary thing was the wireless adaptor on my laptop broke about 30 minutes before the draft was suppose to start. Good thing I had three spare computers where I drafted – really dodged a disaster there. Unfortunately, others were less lucky and we had two no shows at our draft, Kristan and Derek.

Chad: I was battling through my own technical problems earlier in the week, so just in case, I had my friend Dan’s laptop at my disposal during the draft. One computer running a wireless connection, another plugged in just in case something happened. Like ending up with Eli Manning and Vinny Intercept-averde in our football draft after I already had Vince Young. As for Derek, he couldn’t draft because he was without internet, and Kristan was sick from what she told me. Only a pneumonia/AIDS combination could keep me from the draft! Didn’t matter though, she still ended up with Derrek Lee.

Justin: Yeah it’s pretty scary, I can only imagine that Kristan pre-ranked Cubs players higher than others just so she could have some Cubbies on her roster. It seems to happen every year. But… enough with the small talk, I’m sure the readers want to know just how this draft unfolded. I propose we start at the beginning and work our way through the draft. Anything you see that stands out in round one?

Chad: Ya know, in hindsight I really didn’t like where I was positioned. 4th is a solid spot, but imagine if you were at the bottom of the first round and got Ryan Howard, then took Prince Fielder at the start of Round 2…that team would be scarrrrry! I don’t know what I’m going to do this year? I took Jose Reyes at No. 4 overall to play SS for me. I’ve never won a league without Derek Jeter playing there. I already miss my team captain. God I sound like a Yankees fan…

Justin: Yes…. come to the dark side Luke. I am your fath… Sorry I couldn’t stop myself.
Chad: I will fight the force!! Anyways…what’d you notice in the first round?

Justin: I don’t know what’s going on this year with short stops going in round one so much. We had three short stops go: Ramirez, Reyes and Rollins. I opted to go with Matt Holliday. Here’s a guy who will help me in four categories. You can find steals later in the draft. I have to go with power guys early and you just don’t really get that with a short stop. I thought Ryan Braun going at 10 was a little early. I mean we’ve only seen him play about a year in the bigs and he’s already going in round one? Am I crazy or is that a little early?

Chad: I agree completely on the Braun point. Our sample size of him is miniscule. Yes, he had a fabulous season last year, but does that make him a first rounder? He’s not even the most productive fantasy player on his team! As for the shortstops, I can understand why people want those guys early. They are “5 tool” players when it comes to fantasy baseball. And it seems like every year the guy I’m always finding myself trying to trade for is Jose Reyes. He’s got something to prove this year, and that’s why I grabbed him. Answering the question on whether or not you’re crazy…the answer is a resounding yes, and so is Hanley Ramirez going in round 1.

Justin: Oh no you didn’t! People have really hopped on the Hanley train this year even though the Marlins lost Miguel Cabrera, but I still think he warrants a first round pick. He will get you 25 home runs, 50 steals, 125 runs and around 80 RBIs, not to mention that .320 batting average. Do I think he warrants the second overall pick in the draft, no, but I think he’s a first round talent.

Chad: Is he really going to get 80 RBI’s, or score 125 runs for that matter? Who’s going to drive him in? One aspect of handicapping a players fantasy worth is seeing who’s around that player. Jose Reyes isn’t nearly as valuable if he doesn’t have David Wright and Carlos Beltran driving him in. The drafting is different than it was five years ago. There were plenty of 40 home run guys to go around back then. But how many were there last year? Four, maybe? Enough about this topic though. Luke had the final pick of the first round, and in a snake draft, had the first pick in the second round. He took Mark Teixeira with Prince Fielder still on the board. I’m not a big fan of that move. If you’re going for a power first baseman, why not go after the guy with the most power? It’s not like either of them steal bases, or that Mark T does something better than Fielder.

Justin: Yeah. When Fielder fell to me with the 15th pick I was surprised and elated at the same time. Here’s a guy who can hit 50 home runs and drive in 120. I felt he was a border line first-round talent and I was going to draft him no matter who was still on the board. Unfortunately, you drafted two spots behind me in round two, but having Carlos Lee on your team is kind of like being insured by All-State (or is it State Farm?) … you are always in good hands with him.

Chad: I’ll admit, I think I made a mistake with Phillips. Overvalued because of his standout year in 2007, and he could potentially come back down to earth a la Derrek Lee a couple years ago. You know my opinion on pitchers in the first five rounds. It’s just a bad idea, especially in a head-to-head league. Any kind of pitching injury takes exponentially longer to heal than a position player, and you can’t afford to have guys in your Top-5 go down for that long. Look at Chris Carpenter. He threw 6 innings last year before blowing out his elbow and making that dreaded visit to Dr. James Andrews. Too risky in the first couple rounds. You cannot be taking risks early on. And why did Johan Santana drop to Round 2 this year, after moving to the easier league? Makes no sense.

Justin: I think it’s because we play in a league where the owners know better than to reach on a starting pitcher. In round four another thing happened that I know aggravates you, two catchers, Russell Martin and Victor Martinez came of the board. I didn’t fall into that trap though – I took Aramis Ramirez, who should be back to his 30 HR hitting ways, while you took Manny Ramirez, who also should come back strong after a relatively disappointing year.

Chad: Manny in a contract year had me licking my lips when my pick came up. And really, it’s a pseudo contract year because it’s a team option. Nonetheless, if he wants his money, he needs to hit 35 homers again. I’ve had Ramirez in a league each of the last two years, but he’s just gotten too streaky for my liking. Plus, his power numbers are down for some reason. I guess I watch him too much, and pick on him a lot. One catcher coming off the board is ludicrous, and two is even more mind-boggling. I’m glad people do it, because it keeps them from stealing guys I want. I can understand Victor Martinez, but Russell Martin in Round 4? I got him in Round 20 last year! You can get a good catcher late in drafts, and they are the most injury prone out of any position player. Any kind of injury can sit them out for a week because of the rigors they have to go through for the position. Ever heard of Joe Mauer?

Justin: Agreed. There’s just too much talent out there to be focusing on catchers early. Let’s switch this up and go group rounds five through ten into one conversation. What picks stand out to you and why?

Chad: I think Huston Street going in round 8 was a reach. He’s a huge injury concern, and won’t get a lot of save opportunities because of the team the A’s are fielding this year. I don’t even know if they could win the Pacific Coast League title (that’s Triple-A for those of you that aren’t…in-the-know). Francisco Liriano and John Lackey both went in round 10, and those two picks could go either way. Liriano is coming off TJ surgery, but hasn’t thrown with the electricity he did two years ago, and Lackey having arm problems is no bueno for the Angels. But if they can both get back to their old forms, those could be two steals talent wise…you just won’t get the full-year value out of them. Anything stand out to you?

Justin: We saw a lot of the quality closers come off the board in these rounds. There are a lot of experts who preach to not pay for saves, but why not? Closers get you more than saves, they also help to get your ERA and Whip down and will get you Ks as well. I opted to draft four closers in our league, Saito, Cordero (Francisco and Chad) and Hoffman. What’s your stance on closers?

Chad: As you can notice from the draft list, I like taking them early too. They provide those low ERA and WHIP numbers, and high strikeout rates, which is a huge advantage in a H2H league. If a closer gets lit up for say 3 runs in 2/3 IP, it absolutely kills your ERA for that week. You can make up for a bad day like that in a rotisserie league because your taking averages over 1800+ innings. But when you’re only pitching in the vicinity of 30-50 IP per week, a disastrous outing for a closer can really hurt you. That’s why I like taking low-ERA closers who are going to rack up saves. How about rounds 11-15, what jumped off the page at you?

Justin: Carlos Marmol going in the 16th surprised me. I think he’d be a good guy to grab at the end of the draft, but I don’t know what he gets you as long as he’s not the Cub’s closer. I love the Nick Swisher and Josh Hamilton picks because they will more than likely have great years for their respective teams, and I grabbed Jim Thome in the 12th because he was the last guy on the board who I thought had a chance to hit 40 home runs. I see you also took a chance on Pedro in the 11th, which I think could be a make or break guy for your team, do you agree?

Chad: Not break. An 11th round pick is never going to break your team unless you never check it. But if he stays healthy and puts up vintage Pedro numbers, then I just picked up a pitcher who could get 20 wins with 150 K’s in the 11th round. To everyone else, those numbers should be going in 4th. I called Luke the minute he drafted Nick Swisher and berated him on the phone for five minutes. Nick Swisher was THE GUY I wanted out of anyone in the draft. I see him having a monster year in Chicago. I was primed to pick him on the comeback in that round, and Luke yanked him. Prime lesson on why you should always draft the player you absolutely want two rounds before they should go. Another mistake I made…seemed to be an ongoing theme. Give me two guys in the last six rounds that you think were great picks, and give me a couple picks that made you scratch your head.

Justin: The two picks I love would be are Joba Chamberlain in the 19th and Pat Burrell in the last round. Having Joba on your team could really help you down the stretch when he becomes a starter. The guy has some of the most dominating stuff I’ve ever seen and definitely worth a late pick, if for nothing else than stashing away for half of the year. Pat Burrell is a guy who can get you 30 HRs and 100 RBI, now that’s value! As far as the worst two picks of the last six rounds I’m going to have to go with Johnny Damon and Homer Bailey. Both have been dumped already for better players. I drafted Damon, but decided it would be wiser to roll the dice on a guy like Rich Harden. Here’s a guy who has the tools to be a top twenty pitcher if he stays healthy. It’s a big if, but he was a waiver wire pick-up, so I don’t mind the risk. How about you?

Chad: I was going to say Pat Burrell if you didn’t. The problem I have in drafts is I’ve become so engrained in baseball that I write-off guys because of their poor NON-fantasy numbers. Burrell is a guy that strikes out a ton, doesn’t play relatively good defense and doesn’t walk a ton. But he has a ton of fantasy value because of his light-tower power. Guys that rank in this list for me include Burrell, Torii Hunter, Troy Glaus, and the list goes on. Yunel Escobar could be a 20th round steal if he plays as well for the Braves as he did in limited time last year. They traded Edgar Renteria to make room, so the kid must be good. The other great pick is Rick Ankiel. If he plays every day, he could easily hit 35 homers. He hit 43 in 2007 in Triple-A and the majors combined. Will his plate discipline get him a starting role though? Still, great value. The one pick I didn’t like was Evan Longoria. He’s going to be a GREAT fantasy player, but he’s going to start the year in Triple-A because of monetary reasons (they don’t want him becoming a Super-2 player, i.e.: eligible for arbitration after two years instead of three). You have to be playing in the majors to have fantasy value, and we don’t carry minor league spots on our rosters. I do like my Johnny Cueto pick in 20th round. He’s being compared to Pedro at his age because of his 5′10” frame and electric stuff. He could be a potential ace if they make the commitment to him on the major league level.

Justin: We shall see my friend. Well let’s wrap this thing up before we send the women and children running with the size of this thing. How do you feel about your team overall? Who do you think had the best draft and who do you think had the worst?

Chad: I like my team overall, but I always do after a draft. Despite making a couple of errors I don’t typically make, I came out pretty well. My pitching is stronger than it has been in the past, and has the potential to be the best in the league, despite not taking a starter until round 7. I don’t have the 40 HR masher I’m used to having (Ryan Howard each of the past two years, along with Mark T and Matt Holliday thanks to J), but all my guys are going to get at least 20 besides Reyes. I think I have a Top-3 team. Outside of the two of us, the best draft award would go to Craig Heckman. His team is going to hit homers, score runs, and get loads of RBIs, and since he rotates his pitchers through every week (a strategy that I despise) he can afford to let Lackey sit on the pine until he’s healed. He’s got a good team. Nobody had a bad draft, except for the auto-picked teams, but I was a little surprised at Luke’s team. He’s a yearly front-runner, but I’m not a huge fan of his team. Curtis Granderson is a guy that went too high because of his non-fantasy numbers (20-20-20-20 season last year – but only two of those categories count towards fantasy). Nick Markakis is a solid pick, but will they even bother pitching to him with no one else in that lineup that’s going to hurt you? Bannister and Dempster are a bit confusing to me as well. Those are late-round picks with little upside to me. He’s crafty though, and his teams always perform better than they look on paper. Your thoughts?

Justin: One of the big goals of this year’s team for me was becoming more well-rounded. I’ve always focused on power in the past, usually at the cost of speed. This year even though I drafted Holliday and Fielder in the first two rounds I also drafted three guys who went at least 20/20 last year in Upton, Brynes, and Kinsler. I also made it a point to get closers, and took some chances with my starting pitching. As of right now my rotation is Kazmir, Young, Burnett, Perez, Buckholz and Harden. So there’s a lot of risk that could yield a lot of award. I don’t think I came out with the best team, but I think it’s very solid. My favorite team would probably go to the newcomer Ryan Thomas who has a core of: David Wright, Vlad, Corey Hart, Roy Holladay, Sabathia, Jenks and K-Rod. He should be tough to beat this year. I think Ryan Fergueson, another of the newcomers is going to have a rough year, he is very weak at closer and the only hitters I really like on his team are A-Rod, Soriano and Martin. I think he may struggle this year. Any final thoughts, Chad?

Chad: All opinions in this post are subject to change when the season starts in two days, and any copies of this transcript may not be duplicated without the expressed written consent of Major League Baseball. Will I be seeing you on AIM at 5am Tuesday morning my friend?

Justin: For a Red Sox game? I doubt it, I don’t thik I even have any of my players going. Only you are crazy enough to get up to watch that.

Chad: If MLB in 2008 starts at 5am, i’ll be sitting in front of the TV at 4:59 with a bowl of cheerios in front of me, and you can take that to bank! Anyways, Happy Easter everyone!

Justin: Merry Fantasy Baseball to all, and to all a good Easter!

Terry’s Tire World IV Lineup

By: Chad Ruter

Ladies (yes plural) and gentlemen, get ready for Terry’s Tire World IV! Our draft is just days away, and the excitement is mounting exponentially each day. We do have a few new league-members this year, and since everyone is linked through me in some way, shape, or form, I decided to get everyone acquainted with each other using a tool just shy of the greatness of Google, and 100x more creepy. Courtesy of Facebook, I present to you the lineup of TTW-IV for 2008!

1. Craig Heckman – Team Heckman

Pictured with son Carson, Craig is a perennial top-tier guy who may or may not function well without trading partner Lance playing this year due to the fact he’s getting married and moving. Lame excuses I say! Nonetheless, he’ll find his way to stalk the top of the field – maybe this year without the password of the last place person! Don’t screw with me!

2. Kristan Knight – Team Knight

Pictured here with me when we interned in Chicago a couple years ago, she’s your a-typical helpless die hard Cubs fan. Hint: She will take no less than 2 current Cubs players, and will most certainly grab Mark Prior. For those of you that planned on drafting him, don’t even think about it! Despite some middle-of-the-pack performances in past years, Kristan stunned the field by taking the Football variation to Terry’s Tire World.

3. Derek Carroll – Team Fuckadome (sp?) ….yes…you misspelled it.

Pictured here after his cameo stint on “To Catch a Predator,” Derek is working for the government in some way, shape, or form. G14 classified kinda stuff, maybe. I had a friend in the CIA make sure he wasn’t using some sort of governmental supercomputer to run his team, and everything came back clean. Solid player, always pesky. He’s got alligator blood. (By the way, I was joking about the “To Catch a Predator” thing).

4. Ryan Ferguson – Team Ferguson

If you’re wondering why he looks like he’s 14…it’s because he actually is. My former boss at the newspaper (sports editor) and former employee at the radio station, the man knows his stuff. Despite being a Cardinal fan, he does use both halves of his brain in most other circumstances. He low-balled me on every contract I signed for the newspaper, and that’s bad karma. And noooooobody wants to mess with karma – not in fantasy baseball.

5. Kyle Moss – Team Moss

This single, 22-year-old, aspiring journalist enjoys long walks on the beach, candle-lit dinners, and reading a good book next to an open fire. And as of two seconds ago, is on the phone with a hitman giving him my address. Another former boss of mine at the newspaper (asst. sports editor) and employee of mine at the radio station, Kyle is another unfortunate Cardinal fan. One day, he’ll find the light too. As for fantasy baseball…I’ve just heard good things.

6. Ryan Thomas – Results May Vary

Nicknamed RT, the man pictured above would rank among the top-10 hicks that are non-AGR frat members that I met at Western. My former asst. sports director is a Cubs fan by day and one of 6 registered hockey fans left in the United States. When I first asked him to be in the league, he denied. Then I said, “Ryan, I almost didn’t play fantasy football this year, and you know what happened?” He didn’t even have to hear the rest.

7. Justin Jacobs – Joba The Hut

A recent padowan that used the force I taught him for the dark side, this Steinbrenner wannabe had A-Rod, Hanley Ramirez, Matt Holliday, and Mark Teixeira on his team last year and still lost – mainly because he traded the last two guys to me mid-season. This year, he is employing a new strategy dubbed O.B.R. – better known as Operation Beat Ruter. Good luck my friend, may the force be with you.

8. Luke Glendenning – McNamee’s Needles

Don’t let the two youngsters on the outside fool ya. The one on the left is a future left-handed junkballer that will be on the fast-track to the MLB if I have anything to do with it, and the one on the right can guilt you into darn near anything. Oh yea, for the man in the middle, what can I say, he’s my fantasy nemesis. If he’s not leading, he’s right there. Not only that, but I haven’t beat him in a real golf round in nearly two years. I did win our simulated match at St. Andrews, however.

9. Alicia Glendenning – Pulchritudinous Professionals

(See Photo Above)

The lovely wife/mother shown in the picture above is the quintessential trooper that will more than likely beat the crap out of us this year. She’s the reason why no one will ever have a legitimate excuse NOT to play fantasy baseball. Not only is she schooling those two youngsters shown, she’s got a third on the way, and is due toward the end of the season. I’ll be honest with ya…we’re all screwed. Her plan is to lock up the title before she has to have the kid. Now that’s focus people!

10. Chad Ruter – Clemens’ Abscess

This stunningly handsome man pictured above not only uses phenomenal grammar in his team name (mainly because Ferguson and Moss neglected to proofread stories and I would look like an idiot otherwise), but is preparing to take home is third consecutive TTW title. He can’t wait for the season to start and wishes everyone the best while their first round picks rot on the disabled list. 3-Peat, here we come!

NCAA Bracket Challenge Update

We have switched to ESPN for our bracket challenge. You can click here to get to ESPN’s tourney challenge front page. From there just search for the group TOUTS, fill in you bracket and we’ll have some fun. Hope you join up and good look with your office pools

O.B.R.

By: Justin Jacobs

Hello again world.

Sorry about the extended break, but for some reason my school deems it is necessary that we have our midterms during one of the most exciting times of the sports year. Salavy. Now we are indeed, back and better than ever, and just to prove it to you I’m going to give you a post that has been six months in the making. You see, this Thursday night at nine o’clock, that’s central time, I’ll be drafting my fantasy baseball team. This may seem like a completely innocuous thing to do on a Thursday night, but let me assure you, this is my most anticipated night of the year. Yeah, Christmas and New Years have their draws, and I almost always have a good time on my birthday and Halloween, but they just don’t compare to the rush that I get from drafting my fantasy baseball team. I know that sounds a bit strange, maybe even a little homoerotic, but let me explain further.

Last year was an incredibly disappointing year for me in fantasy baseball. I felt I drafted a good team, a team that had a nucleus of: A-Rod, Hanley Ramirez, Matt Holliday and Mark Teixeira. Unfortunately, due to some injuries and instability in my pitching rotation, my team just couldn’t get out of the middle of the pack and I did something that I will probably regret for the rest of my days. I made a rash trade with my arch nemesis, at least in the world of fantasy sports, Chad Ruter. Yes, the same Chad Ruter who’s columns you read on this very site. Now it may be important to note that I have a history of making bad trades with Chad. Three years ago, my first year playing fantasy baseball, I traded Albert Pujols to Chad for Roy Oswalt, and what essential added up to a shit sandwich. Anyone who follows fantasy baseball could tell you how that deal ended up. Pujols went on to have a monster season and my team ended up in last place. Well last year I made what basically was the same mistake. I traded Matt Holliday and Mark Teixeira to Chad for Chris Young, Hideki Matsui and Kevin Youkilis. Well, that didn’t end well, Matt Holliday and Mark Texiera went on to have great years after the all-star break. Whereas Chris Young didn’t fix my pitching and I ended up back at the bottom of the standings… again.

Operation Beat Ruter

This kind of losing motivated me to change the way I approached fantasy baseball. I swore to myself that this year will be different. No longer will I be a slave to bad trades that propel Ruter to championships. That’s Operation Beat Ruter’s rule number one by the way, no making desperate mid-season trades to Ruter. Following this rule alone will decrease Chad’s chances of winning by about 15%. I’ve also ramped up the amount of research I’ve done for this year. Starting in mid-Janurary I bought a number of fantasy magazines along with Baseball Prospectus 2008. Every weekend since then I’ve redone my cheat sheets where I rank every player by position and tier them into groups according to how well I think they will produce in 08. A couple of weeks ago I got to a point where I no longer needed any sheets, I could just tell you what tier a given player was in. At that point I sent Chad a message saying that “I know Kung Fu,” the scary thing was Chad knew exactly what I was talking about.

Another thing that I’ve done this year more than any other is participate in mock drafts. A mock draft is where you get together with 10-12 other people and draft a “mock” team. This is used to see how others are drafting in order to create a sound drafting strategy. I’ve always enjoyed doing mock drafts, but this year, with the loss of my Xbox 360 for a couple of weeks, they’ve become my number one source for recreational fun. I jokingly told Chad that I will have been in 100 mock drafts before the time we actually have our draft, but in reality that total is probably closer to fifty. Although fifty mock drafts is still a daunting number. It’s gotten to a point where I know exactly when a run on a certain position will start and when it will end. I know how the dominoes fall when I take certain players early and have a strategy to act accordingly. Moreover I have a general strategy to how my team is going to be drafted, and even though it is impossible to predict exactly how a draft is going to go, I have a general idea of what my team is going to look like.

The War Room

Of course you can do all the preparation in the world and it won’t mean anything if you don’t bring your “A- Game” on draft night. This is another area where I wanted to be completely and utterly prepared. This year I will be drafting up at my moms’ place in Wisconsin. My sweet mother (happy birthday mom!) has a fantastic HD televison along with a state of the art laptop that I will utilize in order to have a 40 inch draft board at my disposal. Is it completely necessary to have a 40 inch draft board? No, but it is pretty sweet knowing that I will have the coolest looking draft set-up. I will also bring my own laptop along with me so that I can have another screen keeping track of all of the other teams’ draft picks. This comes in handy when you are trying to decide whether or not you can wait for a player to come back around to you in a snake draft. This computer will also be in charge of instant messaging, just to make sure I don’t have too many applications on the laptop will be in charge of the big board. Nothing would be worse than having your system freeze up right before you first pick right?

Now Chad made a bit of a mistake scheduling the draft on the same day that NCAA tournament starts. Anyone who has read this blog knows that Chad and I are suckers for any major sporting event and it would be almost impossible for us to go the entire length of the draft without checking the scores. Well, I have that problem solved as well. To go along with my parents kitchen television that is in perfect view of my drafting area, there is another 30 inch television that is being moved into the “war room”. This television is going to be running any games that may still be being played while the kitchen television will be running on mute with ESPN news on the entire time. I expect to stay 100 percent informed so I don’t start getting antsy and walk away from the draft at any time.

I may or may not have also bought a draft analyzer that will tell me in live time where my team is expected to finish in our league. A little tool that does absolutely nothing but makes me feel good about myself at the end of the draft. Unfortunately I was unable to convince Darlington’s high school cheerleading team to come and give me that extra pep to get me through the later rounds. Now that I think about it, it was probably for the best, I’m not sure what the laws are in Wisconsin, but I don’t need any harassment by law enforcement while I’m trying to prepare for the upcoming season.

To finish things off I bought a bottle of cheap champagne and a twelve pack of Corona. I figure if things go as well as I hope they do I will have cause to celebrate, and even if things go horribly wrong I’ll have enough booze to make myself forget about it. Either way Thursday night is shaping up to be the best night of my year that doesn’t involve naked women or a large scale party… or a combination of both. There’s probably a lot of people out there who think I’m crazy for putting so much effort into such a trivial event. Hell, I’d even have to agree with those people, but I guess if nothing else this is my way of bringing in the spring and what is probably the best time of year in the sports world. It’s a celebration of all things that on the surface seems to be entirely trivial, but deep down are the things that keep you sane during the long winter months. So wish me luck as I look to take the next step in the world of fantasy sports and take down my friend and arch-rival Chad, but I don’t think I’ll need it. Not this year.

March Madness…and Tiger Woods

By: Chad Ruter

Well, I didn’t think I would make a post today, but I decided that I might as well get some thoughts down on the site before I forget them. Before I go any farther, I would like to invite all readers of TOUTS to join our NCAA March Madness pool on cbssportsline.com. Here is the link to our group, with the name of the league being “TOUTS” and the password being “marchmadness” (everything inside the quotes is case-sensitive). The winner of our league will be mentioned loudly and proudly on this site when the tournament concludes. As for Justin and I, there will be stakes to this game. We decided that the loser of the bracket challenge will have to wear the hat of the opposing person’s favorite baseball team for two full days; one day while we are at home and will be together, and another day when we are going through our daily routine. The only time the hat can come off is while showering. I can’t wait to see Justin put on that ratty old Cubs hat that’s sitting at the top of my closet, patiently awaiting its release on opening day.

As for the tournament selections, there are a few things that come to mind.

-I wholeheartedly agree with the committee’s decision to put Arizona in the tournament over Arizona State. Yes, they were two very close teams, and ASU did beat the Wildcats in their two meetings this year, but that isn’t the whole story. Arizona played the second toughest schedule in the country, and played 11 games during the season without one of their two best players. The Sun Devils on the other hand played an incredibly easy schedule in comparison, and didn’t fight through the injuries that Zona did. The committee awards the at-large bids to the 34 best teams that didn’t qualify automatically, and Arizona fits the bill.

-North Carolina was voted as the No. 1 overall seed in the tournament, and then got matched up with what many consider the toughest road to the Final Four out of all the No. 1s. I couldn’t agree more, but remember one thing, they don’t have to leave the state of North Carolina until the Final Four in San Antonio. They’ll play four home games if they make it that far, and I would consider that an absolute lock at this point, no matter the competition.

-Wisconsin won the Big Ten regular season and tournament titles, was the No. 5 team in the country, and then rewarded with only a No. 3 seed in the tournament. Duke, Georgetown, Tennessee, and Texas – the four No. 2 seeds all lost in their respective conference tournaments, and two of those teams lost before the championship game. The Badgers are a two seed, and that’s all there is to it.

-I was absolutely stunned when CBS released the East Regional, and had Butler listed as a No. 7 seed. They are ranked 10th in the country at this point, and the committee put them into the 25-28 overall portion of their list. How can the discrepancy be that big? Yes, they didn’t play in a great conference, but it’s not like they’re playing D-II schools. They should be no worse than a 5 seed.

-If you think the tournament committee didn’t plan that 6/11 matchup between Kansas State and USC, you’re kidding yourself. On display in that game will be two of the top 7 picks in the NBA draft come June, including the man that will go No. 1 overall in Michael Beasley. Don’t miss this game folks.

Getting away from NCAA Basketball, I want to paint a picture for you. 72nd hole at Bay Hill, and the Arnold Palmer Invitational. The wind is blowing at about 10 mph from left to right, and fans across the golf course have flocked to the picturesque 18th hole. A stunningly beautiful par-4 measuring in at 441 yards. A large pond guards the front of the green and two the right, with massive rocks in front to play ping-pong with the ball if you come up a yard short. Tiger Woods stands on the tee, tied with a fellow by the name of Bart Bryant, who’s sitting patiently in the scorers shed off the 18th green, waiting to see how his night was going to unfold. Most players would be out swinging their favorite club, trying to stay loose while expecting to play extra holes. Not Bart Bryant, he sat in that tiny wooden trailer just listening to the crowd, and watching the best in the world send him home in second place. He already knew it was over.

Tiger, as calm as a man teeing off in a solo practice round, rips a 3-wood past his playing partner’s (Sean O’Hair) ball in the left-center of the fairway, providing a perfect angle to a green that is one of the most intimidating in golf to stare down. After O’Hair blasts his second shot over the green into a massive bunker, the wind picks up out of nowhere. The golf Gods way of upping the ante for the best player in the world. Tiger, along with veteran caddy Steve Williams, notice the shift instantaneously. Steve pulls a mid-iron (believed to be a 6-iron) out of the bag, and tells Tiger he’s got 167 (yards) to the pin, but to play the shot as if its 180 due to the wind blowing into their faces and toward the right. Tiger responds to his caddy’s gameplan with a simple, “Sounds good,” with no doubt in his mind he was going to hit the perfect shot. Which, in this situation, was to aim 10 yards left of the pin, not only to take the water short and right out of play, but to let the wind push the ball directly towards the mid-right pin position.

Showing off the third different swing in his short career in perfect tempo, Woods dropped the ball 24 feet left and high of the pin, leaving a downhill, left-to-right slider that most players would be lagging close to guarantee a playoff. Not Tiger. He stalked around the putt, knowing damn good and well that the best player in the world lags no putts on the 72nd hole – the best drop the putt to leave no doubt. Bob Costas and the NBC crew then told viewers a stat that put the cherry on top: Tiger was 0-for-21 on putts longer than 20 feet during his four days at Bay Hill. Did he need another reason? Instead of sitting in my recliner figuring the odds of the putt being made, I was trying to decide how Mr. Woods would celebrate his 5th consecutive PGA Tour victory. Would he use the patented fist pump? Would he stalk the putt and throw the ball in the water that haunts the 18th green? Would he meekly look up and smile while the putt hit the bottom of the cup? Well, he did none of those. He struck the putt with perfect speed and aim, and with five feet to go he began backpedaling up the hill toward the rough, and as the ball dropped in, grabbing his TW hat and spiking it into the ground, shaking the earth with his greatness.

Was their ever any doubt? Not for a moment.

Spring Break Update

By: Chad Ruter

It’s been 11 days since our last post. Despite neither of us traveling outside the state, we both decided to take a spring break away from the website. Two things we’re really anxious to talk about are the NCAA Tournament, and Fantasy Baseball. We haven’t talked an ounce about fantasy baseball due to the fact that half of things we say before draft-day is complete B.S. We try to misinform each other beyond a point to which we could conceivably write about it. Our draft takes place on Thursday, and you can bet that we’ll go full-blown baseball by that point. Justin and I will also go head-to-head in March Madness, and we’ll provide a link in the next day or two to where you can play alongside of us. That’s it for today. Just waiting for Tiger to close things out at Bay Hill, and the brackets to come out…setting the table for the field of 65 to begin play on Thursday (with the opening round game on Tuesday night). So get ready people. The real sports have just begun.